3 tips for managing awkward conversations

We’ve all had them: awkward conversations with long silences that seem to end too early, go on for way too long, or where you spend more time looking at your hands than at the person you’re speaking to.

There are many reasons for awkward conversations:

• If you are shy, or if the person you are talking to is. Or both!
• If it is a difficult topic (e.g. sexuality with your kid or someone being laid off at work)
• If you have different opinions (e.g. if the conversation turned political)
• If you are talking to someone you don’t know very well.
• If there is a lot of pressure on the conversation (e.g. a job interview)

Whatever the reason may be, there are several ways you can manage these interactions and feel less awkward:

Think ahead and rehearse

If you know you will be in a setting where you will need to make conversation, consider some points you might want to make beforehand. If you can practice with someone you trust, or even in the mirror, this may help as well. This is especially helpful for those difficult and high-pressure conversations.

Be open

You might also try to be more open to different opinions, or consider why the other person seems awkward—perhaps they are shy, for example. You can also be open with the other person when you are unsure how to respond, or need to mull something over more, like saying, “That’s interesting. I want to think about that for a bit,” or “I’m not comfortable talking about that right now.”

Ask questions

If there are awkward silences, asking “What have you been up to lately?" can potentially bring up a new topic you can both relate to. Ask questions about the person you are speaking to—generally, people enjoy talking about themselves. And of course, if all else fails, you can always fall back on, “How about that weather?”